What is your love story?
Sandra and I met at work when I was a program coordinator and she was a therapist. When I first started my buddies kept talking about someone I would "love". They joked and said, "You're going to absolutely love her! Her name is Sandra. I'll introduce you to her. Nobody knows her story, but you never know!" I fired back, "How are you so sure?". They hit me with "Because everyone loves her!"
Fast forward 2 weeks. I was thrown into running group supervision for our therapists. I started a 7 a.m. group for those who needed earlier groups. As I was running the group I heard a voice behind me ask, "Is this the supervision for MTs and BSCs?" I turned around and locked eyes with the most gorgeous brown-eyed woman I'd ever seen standing in the doorway. My world completely stood still. I nodded and said "Yes. Yes. Yes. Come on in. Take a seat." Clearly, me repeating my words showed my nerves. I continued the session but I didn't want to get caught staring too long at her.
Afterward, people left, but she lingered behind. We got to talking about how we were both from NY and chatted about psychological cases. We spoke for at least an hour after the session, but I never got her name. I quickly scanned the sign-in sheet to see who the last name was, but I couldn't find it. Too many new people to put a face to a name.
I quickly told my buddy, Shawn about the interaction and he tried to help me figure out who she was. He swore he thought she was Sandra, and her name was on the sign-in sheet, but too close to the middle to be her.
A couple of days went by and my other buddy Erik brought me into his supervision to meet some of the other staff. He told me that Sandra was in his supervision and he would show me who it was. He gestured in her direction discretely.
Wouldn't you know - They were right. I was totally, 100%, into Sandra. Her gorgeous appearance. Her intelligent wit. Her illuminating charm. Everything about her was everything to me. Unfortunately. I had no idea what her story was and none of the guys I spoke to knew either. However, there was ALWAYS a line of people waiting to chat with her. So naturally I hung back.
A few weeks later her friend Zlata and I started talking about cases and life in general. Sandra's name came up and I enlisted her to help me figure out if she was with anyone or if she was interested in women. Zlata came back a day later and told me, "She said we both have significant others." That did not help me at all! LOL. I thanked her for taking a shot, but also told her "I'm still right where I started." Regardless she had someone so I would never attempt to interfere. Plus we do work together so that's never advisable! LOL.
I kept it cordial. We continued to chat. I got stuck running her original supervision from 12:00-1:00p and got to see her every Wednesday. Once it got around at work that I had a crush on her everyone would greet me on Wednesdays saying something ....
"It's Sandra Wednesday!" "Are you ready for supervision?" "Sandra is coming!"
The best news was after supervision Sandra would pop by with Zlata and spend an additional hour with me just chatting about cases. I thought what better way than to get her to notice me through my intelligence? So I showed off a little bit! Why not?
My buddies started to notice that she would always drop by and chat with me and that she was around a lot more than she ever was before I started. I told them they were delusional, but I couldn't help but wish they were right. Still. I never let on. My best friend, Shawn knew, the office management had an idea, and her friend Zlata kept it secret.
After a year or so I received another job offer and took it. When I was getting ready to leave my best friend threw a little going away party for me and Sandra showed! She hugged me goodbye and that was it.
I dropped off from everyone for a few months, before receiving a text that read, "When are we going to be facebook official?" It was from her! I was so excited, but needed to play it cool. I replied, "Whenever you want!" We started to reconnect, but the texting was sparse.
After a few more months my buddy from school needed a volunteer who was not a student to practice psych testing for our final exam since his buddy dropped out. I told him I knew just the person and quickly asked Sandra if she would accompany me to my school to help him out. She obliged. I was SO nervous, but I wanted to see her.
I picked her up and off we went. We chatted the whole way there while waiting, through lunch (with Mike), and back home. When I got her back to her place we hugged goodbye and said we should get together soon. She ended it with saying "I would invite you up, but it's a little messy." The way she said it I swear I started to see what Shawn was saying all along. But, I let it go. I replied, "I totally get it. I'll see you soon enough."
My buddy Mike immediately texted me and said "Hey! Is your friend single?" (And she was at this point. LOL). I said "Nope. She's got someone." I admit I was a little zealous, but I also did not want to let a potential opportunity slip.
Weeks later she texted me innocently saying we should hang out again. Something changed after this and we started flirting through texts. However, it wasn't consistent so I just assumed it was playful - nothing serious. But, one thing led to another and we started talking about going out for ONE night only. We were clearly physically attracted to one another but also were not ready for anything too serious. We agreed it would be just for a night. We planned a movie and a dinner. I picked out the movie, but then she called me back and said she switched the movie to my favorite. BOLD Move! I started to think she might be too well-versed in this. I never had someone call the shots before. I called Shawn and said, "She pulled an audible and chose my favorite movie instead!" He replied, "You have met your match!".
Needless to say. I couldn't focus on the movie. We shared an incredible evening together and then I left. I was not supposed to stay over, but then again it was late LOL. I woke up early, kissed her goodbye, and went to work.
No more than 6 hours later I get a text - it's from her. "What are you doing tonight?" I had to read the text over and over again! Was she really texting me after we decided it was only one night together?! I responded immediately saying "Not a thing! Why? What are you thinking?" - We hung out again.
We went from one or two days a week to full weekends to half a week into a full week and before we knew it we were together. However, neither of us wanted to put a label on it. Such a strange situation to be in. LOL. From the beginning, I always knew I had feelings for her, but she didn't necessarily know this. I kept Shawn in the loop every step of the way, but I never used her name. He just knew I was totally into someone and was incredibly happy for me!
When 2020 hit we got quarantined together. We never got bored of one another and that's when I knew this was a real thing. But, I was afraid and she never let on she wanted anything romantic. Finally, I asked her if we could go steady, she laughed and said "No" but kissed me goodbye and went to work. I told Shawn what happened, but said "I'll wait" LOL. (*She'll tell you I asked her right after I gloated about how many girls wanted me and asked, "Who wouldn't want to be with me?" - I probably said that. My nerves make me stupid!)
By the time 2021 hit I asked her again. She said "Yes." However, she was still nameless to my best friend and to many others. I never posted her on socials, and she never posted me. I wanted a private relationship (and so did she). By April, we signed our lease and moved in together. I was ecstatic. However, our relationship stayed private.
By 2022, I let Shawn in on who she was and he was totally shocked! He understood why I didn't say anything. He was so happy. We set up a Zoom meeting and they were able to reconnect too. They obviously already knew each other! It was great to finally tell him. In the same year. I finally told her I loved her. (I'm a little slow. Also incredibly superstitious so I didn't want to jinx it!).
I planned it around Valentine's Day. She loves the "month of love" (and is born in it!). Did I mention Aquarius + Gemini is an incredible mix? (For those of you who are into signs! LOL) I bought her a necklace that when you shine the light into it you can see "I love you" on the wall and I wrote a letter on a scroll that hung off a rose. (Hopeless romantic!). Little did I know she was planning to tell me the same thing! She also wrote a letter to me -- and beat me to it LOL. We laughed together and grew even closer! By the middle of 2022, we started to let other friends and family know about our relationship. Some were surprised, and some were suspecting but all were accepting! Sometimes when you're in a same-sex relationship you just never know!
I always knew I wanted to be with her from the minute she stepped into that supervision room. When you know - you know!
We share the same hopes, dreams, and values. We celebrate each other at our best and stick by each other at our worst. We never tried to change one another and accept each other unconditionally.
And, by 2023 I was planning a proposal. From snooping on her Pinterest to figure out her style of engagement ring to casually bringing up questions about weddings. I finally designed a ring I knew she'd love. And, after endless hours of figuring out the perfect proposal spot - it was booked.
But, most importantly, after 7 years of knowing each other and almost 4 years of dating, we're getting married!
Who would have thought that colleagues could become lovers?
